Ambien. No doubt about it.
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
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