I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
