did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Randomize
