I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Randomize
