she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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