I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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