He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
