So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Randomize