Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Randomize
