Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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