i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
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