...so i touched it.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
