the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Just pee around me
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize