I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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