Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
