i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
