I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Randomize
