If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
