But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Randomize