I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
