ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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