haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
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