your parents love me but you hate me
butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Randomize
