i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Randomize
