Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
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