I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Randomize
