Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
