I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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