her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
dude. I can hear the air.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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