I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Your shirt... Was in my pants
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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