Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
That reminds me...we need to get swords
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
