I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
It's just like the Real World with babies
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize
