Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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