id be glad to
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
