honey bunches of taint.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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