you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
