I'm drive I can fine osifer
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
