They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Randomize
