Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
pray to the hookup gods
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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