You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize
