We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
