exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
