I look better un-naked...
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
