new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
where are my pants?
in the oven.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
