Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
Is Oprah even human
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
