Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Randomize
