When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Randomize
