Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
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