just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
I would fuck him just for his dog
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
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