Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Randomize
