i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize